Looking for Better Relationships? Make Improv your Valentine
Unless you live under a rock or don’t have a calendar, your probably aware of a certain important date that comes around in the middle of February every year. What’s that? You don’t know what I’m talking about?
I’ll give you a hint. It’s on 14 February. A lot of people are getting excited for it. It might result in a few people going to the movies together. It’s not the release of the ‘Madame Web’ movie (sorry if you are excited for that…although have you seen the trailer? You probably shouldn’t be).
I am of course talking about Valentine’s Day. And whether you think it’s a wonderful celebration of love or a day that was created by advertising executives to sell more chocolates and gift cards, I’m sure it leads to a certain level of self-reflection from us all about how we interact with other people.
So whether you’re facing Valentine’s Day alone or have a special someone to celebrate it with, we here at Improv Queensland are about to let you in on a secret as to how you can strengthen your current a future relationships. And that secret is…Improv! Shocking right?
Yes, Improv is a gateway to love. And that’s not just us, Brisbane’s best known improvisation company, saying it. Science is also on the Improv bandwagon.
So let us share with you, completely free of charge, the ways in which Improv can help you (yes YOU!) find and keep that special someone.
Humour
Improv and humour usually go hand in hand. Practicing and performing improv is a great way to develop your sense of humour and show off just how effortlessly funny you can be, while also encouraging people to laugh at themselves more and to be more comfortable being silly.
As it turns out, humour is a relationship gold mine. Being funny straight up makes you more desirable as a mate and therefore be more likely to be chosen as a relationship prospect.
Once you are in a relationship, if you use humour to cheer up your significant other, they are more likely to be satisfied in the relationship. Also, if you are afraid of being laughed at, you will likely also be uncomfortable feeling vulnerable and report lower relationship satisfaction. So using Improv skills to cheer others up and become more comfortable in yourself will result in you having more satisfactory relationships.
Yes, and
The ‘Yes, and’ concept is probably the foundational principle of Improv. Once of the first things new improvisers are taught is to recognise and accept offers from their scene partners (“Yes”) and build on those offers by making suggestions of their own (“And”).
It turns out, people in relationships are constantly making verbal or non-verbal gestures that signal a need for attention. Just like improvisers in a scene, a person in a relationship will often throw out ‘offers’, for example, in the form of a smile, a question or a quick kiss, that they hope their significant other will recognise and build on. Research has shown that couples who ‘turn towards’ or say ‘Yes, and’ to their partners’ offers for connection are much more likely to stay together. So building your ability to ‘Yes, and’ through Improv will make you much more likely to build connection in a relationship.
Agreeableness and extraversion
Many studies have shown that people of all walks of life find agreeableness (i.e. being kind and supportive) and extraversion (i.e. a sense of fun) to be attractive qualities.
But what’s that? You’re saying you’re an aggressive loner who would much rather read a book or watch a movie by yourself than socialise in a group? Don’t worry, Improv has you covered.
Science says that Improv will result in you enjoying the company of others, becoming kinder and more trustworthy and also lead you to become more trusting in others. So put that book down, turn off Netflix and do some Improv!
Being in groups
Improv the ultimate group activity (take that sports!). it involves teams of people supporting each other’s ideas and backing each other up.
Apparently, according to science, just hanging out in a group will make you seem more attractive. Yes, in what has been coined “The Cheerleader Effect”, people will seem more attractive in a group than they are in isolation. And we have photographic evidence to prove this.
Take this photo of a typical group of improvisers. All pretty attractive on their own. But in this group photo! Phwoar! Somebody cover my computer screen before I have to have a cold shower!
It’s pretty clear that engaging in Improv will make you much more likely to start and grow a positive relationship. So this Valentine’s Day, before you slide into someone’s DM’s, why not slide into one of our workshops instead?